When people ask how you’re doing at the end of the semester
i laughed way too hard at this
- Nephew: Star Wars was in Captain America's list of things to see right? Is he going to watch all six? He's going to find out that Nick Fury is a Jedi.
oh shit theres a baby on board? fuck well i guess i wont rear end you like i normally would
the baby on board sign is to alert paramedics in the event of a crash that theres a baby that needs to be attended to first u absolute fucking walnut
absolute fucking walnut
I want to find my other half. My soul mate. The one person who can supply me with more happiness than sadness. I know, I wish to find love. The equal, unconditional, passionate sort of love. I can only wait, wait for it to come to me. Maybe I have to wait till I deserve it. I have to wait till love finds me. Or maybe I have to wait till I have stopped waiting. Once the search is over and I am left with the treasure of someone, I must know everything. I must absorb the good and the bad of them and then project the good and the bad of me. I must understand. Understand their fears, their insecurities, understand everything. I want to know them inside and out, backwards to front- every crease and every fold, every leap and every halt. I want it all. And in return, my gift is an open book. That way you can see me in every light, the sunshine and the rain, the inbetweeness and the emptiness of the ink stained, partly shredded pages that I offer. I am not a box, you cannot limit my existence in a piece of cardboard meant to hold objects, not people; but instead, you can read each page of me, each memory, each regret and then interpret them in whichever way you desire. I have words written all over me, sometimes seen in my eyes or in the cracks of my painted lips. I am ink. An opposite. A black and white novel, searching for my sequel.
you should write a book
I have this headcanon where Steve’s son is born with his original health maladies and wants to grow up to be just like his dad - and Steve is confronted with all these feelings of inadequacy as a father because he realizes his son can’t grow up to be like him. But no kid will probably ever be better protected from bullies, considering who all his uncles are. It’s probably just a matter of time before Uncle Tony builds him some really sweet replacement braces (“Should they have spinning rims? I feel like they should have spinning rims.”)
YOU SEE THOSE JAGGED BITS ON THE FLOOR?!
THAT’S MY BROKEN HEART.
After an announcement yesterday outlining what girls (and only girls) could and could not wear to school today (even though it was 80 degrees and the school would not turn on the air conditioner) someone posted this in a stairwell. A lot of girls were supportive of these posters, seeing as some teachers were sending down absolutely any girls wearing shorts.